Not long ago, a very good friend of mine, someone I hold so
dear and have great respect for sent me this quote, “Making friends is like
wearing sandals. If they do not fit then you remove them.” – Ashanti
This got me thinking and after a considerable time ruminating
over this, some sort of insight dawned on me.
I remembered my growing up days and realized that I wore
‘over-sized shoes’ many times.
When I was much younger (I don’t know if you experienced
this) and my mum bought us any shoes that were ‘over-sized,’ it was customary
for us to ‘pack’ papers in them so they could fit and not fall off when we wore
them.
Now, it is pertinent we remind ourselves again that this
piece is not about ‘Shoes,’ but ‘Friendship/relationship.’
I am currently working on a biography for a retired Reverend,
which will be published soon. During one of the interview sessions I had with
the man and his wife of over fifty years, she (the wife obviously) told me
something that will remain forever indelible on the canvas of my heart as a
lesson. She said, “Friendship/Relationship/Marriage
is like wearing a cloth, when it gets dirty
you don’t throw it away, rather, you wash it; iron it; and generally ensure
that it is clean and looks presentable so it can be worn again.”
You see, there is no place on earth where you will have a
perfect human/human relationship(s). But where you see or find one who shows
commitment; sincerity; respect; regard and true love for you and your person,
such a friend should not be discarded, rather be cherished.
What you should do if you have issues that bother on
uncertainties and areas you are not clear about as far the
friendship/relationship is concerned is to enliven and strengthen the cord of
communication so that you both can together find light and shed it on the dark
areas that may be bringing doubts.
What the Reverend’s wife said confirmed to me again that with
proper communication and commitment on the part of each party in the union,
there is no difference that cannot be resolved. Like I always say, there
is no almighty formula for solving or resolving love equations, it only takes
sincerity, openness, trust and commitment.
Finally, my dear reader, I encourage you to think again
before you jettison that friendship/relationship that is making you ‘angry,’
especially if the person you are angered against has shown sincerity and true
commitment to the friendship/relationship.
I am your friend, brother and coach, Abiodun Mabadeje -
Author/Speaker/Actor/Publisher/Minister/Counsellor. +234 – 8023771690,
+234-8135781291, bbm: 7445F1FE abiodun.mabadeje@gmail.com
